Live Better with Willie Jolley: Not My Mother's Husband!
Not My Mother’s Husband!
By Dee Taylor-Jolley
Let me tell you a story that happened almost twenty-eight years ago. The aisles at Ikea were intimidating. Boxes stacked more than forty feet high were filled with furniture waiting to be assembled. The customers all looked like Willie and me - hunting for furnishings to turn our small space into a home.
We left with the prize – a four-foot grey laminated desk in a box, ready for assembly.
After dinner, we retired to our private quarters - the attic! We lived with “Ma Jolley,” Willie’s mother. We were saving to purchase a home. Paying no rent was a blessing!
I opened the box and pulled out the assembly directions. That’s when I discovered it! My husband was not the Tim “The Tool Man” Taylor (from the show, Home Improvement)! Not even remotely. Willie was always focused on building his dreams and goals, certainly not on building or assembling a desk.
I felt like that baby deer caught in the headlights. I was stunned. I had a brain freeze. I assumed my husband was like my Dad. Dad had built our family home, and was even the general contractor for the building of the First Hampton A.M.E. Zion Church, where he served as pastor! He could repair autos, was a licensed barber and even cooked dinner.
And here I was with a hammer, a screwdriver and a husband who could only read me the instructions. The spirit of my mother (Lillie Mae) came over me. “No problem,” I heard myself say, as I eased my eighth month pregnant frame down to the floor, “We’ll figure this out together.”
I made a couple of mental notes that night: (a) never purchase any item that had to be assembled; (b) keep the number of a qualified handyman on speed dial and (c) never compare my husband to my mother’s husband (my Daddy)!
Father’s Day is near. And though my Dad has been gone for ten years, whenever I was around him, I felt secure. He gave unconditional love. Plus Dad was totally vested in whatever was important to me. And as I think about it, Willie makes me feel the exact same way! But how could this be? He has none of my Daddy’s skills!
After 28 years of marriage, I think I’ve figured it out. It’s the character of the man that’s more important than the specific skills he possesses!
Dad and Willie possess the same character traits:
(1) Always a man of his word – that certainly builds your trust in them!
(2) Attentive and thoughtful – that shows caring.
(3) And a champion for your goals and dreams.
Being with my Dad made me want to accomplish more -be a better human being. Being with Willie makes me strive to be better in every aspect of my life- as a wife, a business partner and as a mother.
On second thought, Willie is like my mother’s husband - providing a secure, nurturing, yet challenging environment for me and our family to become all God has destined us to be. Thank you Dad. Thank you Willie.
Happy Father’s Day!
Dee Taylor-Jolley, President & Training Manager, Willie Jolley Worldwide
Dee Taylor-Jolley is the President of The Jolley Institute, the learning division of Willie Jolley Worldwide, which focuses on presentation skills, leadership development and customer service.
She holds a Masters Degree in Curriculum Design from The Catholic University of America.
